(Disclaimer:  Even though LIQUID SMOKE is now available, this post is not about LIQUID SMOKE.  But you should go buy it anyway if you haven’t.  Because if you don’t, it’s quite likely that you’ll be the last one to get it and you know what happens to the last one to get it, right?  ROTTEN EGG, SUCKER!)

When I was in the seventh grade (I think), I had to get glasses.  I was told I had an astigmatism, which, at the time, sounded like a cross between asparagus and asthma and it was IN MY EYES.  Turns out, that’s not what it is at all.  Just meant I had some vision issues and I was going to need glasses for the rest of my life.  I wore them off and on for a number of years – mostly off – and then about ten years ago, I had to start wearing them full time.  I tried contacts but we don’t get along.  So I’ve been wearing glasses for seemingly forever now and my vision has gotten worse as I’ve gotten older and man it totally sucks getting old because, you know, I like to see.  Someday, I will work up the nerve for LASIK.  (But, seriously.  Lasers.  IN MY EYES.)

Anyway, my daughter was diagnosed with a very mild astigmatism about two years ago, but at the time, it didn’t need correcting.  Ever since then, though, she’s complained about blurry vision and usually right after the complaint she says “And when do I get to get glasses?”  Which is really funny because she actually wants them.  It seems that, among her friends, it’s now cool to have glasses.  Which tells me one thing.

Kids today are nerds.

So this week she went back to the eye doctor and he granted her wish.

I can’t wait to tell her that there might be asparagus in her eyes.